Directional talk, or dialogue?

Previously I shared CALM for receiving critical feedback. You can also have a Curious Active Listening Mindset for giving feedback.

In fact, from directional conversations to dialogue, CALM can be a #leadership #mindset and style of conversation entirely.

Curious Active Listening Mindset (CALM) For <Giving Feedback>

1. Set-up the stage for a dialogue

• “Can I share with you something I noticed?”

2. State the facts — just the situation and observed behavior

• Avoid making comments of character judgment

3. Invite their thoughts — calmly with curiosity, listen to understand

• Suspend assumptions
• Quiet the mind, no listening to respond, no parallel thinking
• Listen with no interruption, no interpreting while listening

4. Playback what was said

• Acknowledge what was heard

5. Offer support

• Differences are ok, ask more questions for mutual understanding

6. Offer to speak again

Curious Active Listening Mindset (CALM) For <Receiving Feedback>

1. Calmly with curiosity, listen to understand

• Suspend assumptions
• Quiet the mind, no listening to respond, no parallel…

Receiving critical feedback is dreadful. Our defensive routines get triggered and however we might understand that the feedback giver is speaking with good intention, it’s still difficult to listen.

Try CALM — “Curious Active Listening Mindset“:

1. Calmly with curiosity, listen to understand

• Suspend assumptions
• Quiet the mind, no listening to respond, no parallel thinking
• Listen with no interruption, no interpreting while listening

2. Playback what was said

• Acknowledge what was heard

3. Ask for support

• Differences are ok, voice back as necessary
• Ask to co-create solutions

4. Agree to speak again

With a Curious Active Listening Mindset, there’s a…

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Transcript

Welcome to Design Thinking. Hi, I’m Coach Takeshi. In this short video, I will explain what is Design Thinking, how we do Design Thinking, and most importantly, why we do Design Thinking.

Let’s start with clarifying the difference between Design Thinking, Agile and Lean. Well, consider them all the same.

Technically they all come from different origins; Agile from the software development world in the late 90s, and Lean from Lean Manufacturing made famous by the Toyota way, and Lean Startup after the first dot-com bubble burst again in the…

Here’s a rapid Design Thinking practice exercise that I do in my training sessions. It’s really simple. You pair up in buddies and by gifting each other an origami craft, you can go through the full empathize, define, ideate, prototype and test stages in just 30 minutes.

Origami Gift Exercise

• Form pairs
• Take turns interviewing each other; learn who your neighbor is, what they like, aspire etc. (Empathize)
• Your gift to your neighbor will be something that represents them. What makes her/him/them special? Think of values, characters and other unique things about them. (Define)
• Ideate what kind of paper craft you can build…

I use three mental models to describe my pedagogy (theory and practice of education):

Structured + Unstructured Learning

• Lecturing, teaching, textbook learning fall into the realm of structured learning.
• Coaching, mentoring, parental conversations are examples of unstructured learning.
• Then in between, we have hybrid and blended learning which is everything else, or more correctly everything — learning is seldom completely structured or unstructured. Training, facilitation, workshops, practicing, debating, playing and work itself are good examples of hybrid and blended learnings.

Vertical + Horizontal Learning

• Consider vertical learning as learning done in a planned, formal setting with a teacher or instructor. …

Transcript

Linear thinking is our default. We are very good at planning and making lists.

Linear thinking is simple and great because it keeps us organized and it’s a systematic and intuitive way of doing things.

The problem is the opportunity cost associated to linear thinking. Are all options explored? Is that the only way? How do I know what’s missing? When we generate tunnel vision, we can’t see what’s beyond. That’s an opportunity loss.

This article is intended for professional behavioral coaches, typically ICF (International Coach Federation) certified executive, leadership, team, organizational coaches who are considering to become professional process coaches as well, and vice versa for professional process coaches, commonly Agile coaches, Design Thinking facilitators and Lean (Lean TQM and Lean Startup) practitioners, considering to become professional behavioral coaches simultaneously.

Table of Contents

1. Why It Works: Behavioral Coaching + Process Coaching

2. Funny Things Happen in Organizations

3. Wanted: Organizational Learning Interventionists

4. Economics and Benefits of Becoming an ICF + Agile Coach

5. How to become an ICF + Agile Coach

…